Echoes Of Us
by demeter18
Summary: Peyton deals with loss and finds comfort in all the things that are left behind. One Shot


**Echoes of Us**

Death comes to us all, it comes in all manner of everyday activities, and it touches everything in its wake and leaves an impression.

Peyton woke up breathing heavily, her cheeks were moist to the touch, and her fingers gently clasped the locket around her neck. She inhaled painfully and felt her chest tighten in pain; this had been going on for days now. Every time she closed her eyes, images and memories would assail her, she felt bombarded and in so much pain that even the simplest of things had her going. She spent night after night clutching her favourite sweatshirt of his close to her body, she inhaled his scent and the tears once again overtook her.

The house was full of him, everywhere she turned, every room she stood in-were all filled with Luke. She could hear echoes of his laughter in a picture hanging in the hallway; she could feel his love all around her. He was everywhere and she felt so suffocated and yet so comforted all at the same time. Peyton dropped his sweatshirt on their bed, collected her keys and stepped outside. It had been barely a week and she hadn't left the house once, she decided a ride in her car would perhaps start the healing process. Any which way she looked at it-she figured it wouldn't do any harm, she already felt broken and incomplete-it couldn't possibly get any worse.

She settled herself in the driver's seat of the Comet, she scrolled through her play lists and her eyes settled upon La Rocca she pressed play and rested her palms on the steering wheel. The music blared out of her stereo speakers and she put the car in drive, she drove down to the river bend. She saw in her mind's eye the very first time she ever spoke to him, she smiled as she remembered how mean she had been.

To her he was just the bastard son of her boyfriend's father, he was the outsider and she was the popular cheerleader dating the captain of the basketball team. They couldn't have been more opposite in the social spectrum if they tried. She insulted him in a roundabout way and then he did something that surprised her, he told her something about himself. Words like he's different, he's compassionate and intelligent rolled around in her mind. That day changed everything; it was the start of something, a friendship and a connection that she didn't know yet was going to be the focal point of her entire existence one day.

Peyton rolled the car to a stop and turned off the ignition, she got out of the car and stood at the water's edge, she threw a pebble out into the water and watched the ripples lap at one another in ever widening circles.

Being so close to their places soothed Peyton, she felt at home, she remembered their wedding day, the moment Sawyer was born. All of it pulled her heart and made her ache in places she didn't think it was possible to ache in.

He had promised her an 'Us', not a you and a me, but an us. She had put her faith in that promise, she had put her heart in it, and everything she was and could be was tied to that promise. She got angry, how was it possible that everything could change in just one single moment? How could one wrong choice take it all away? She kicked at the rocks at her feet and screamed out loud, she felt a piece of her grief strip away, she was finally beginning to deal with it, she still referred to it as an it. This was her way of not feeling it so keenly, if she said words like, death and forever-her heart slowed till it almost stopped. There was too much finality in those words, she could hold pieces of him and her and perhaps somehow that would make it ok.

The sky turned a brilliant shade of magenta and the sun dipped beneath the horizon, the wind picked up and she heard the gentle rustling of the leaves. Her phone vibrated in her pocket, Haley was calling her. Peyton clicked her phone onto silent and put it back in her pocket. It was the third call she had gotten that day, everyone wanted to see her and offer condolences and shroud her in love. Peyton didn't think she could cope with all the sympathy and empathy; she needed time on her own and moments like this where she finally found herself able to breathe.

The funeral had just about killed her, no tears had been shed, she had cried in the silence of their bedroom, in the shower when she got up in the morning, she cried in her chair at work and she cried after she closed Sawyer's bedroom door at night. Her daughter, their daughter would smile at Peyton and goofily squint at her. It took everything in her-just to hold the tears at bay; she was too young to know the devastating effect Luke's death had been on their life.

Peyton was reminded of him everyday in little ways that became big ways, as Sawyer got older she would ask questions about her dad. Like what he was like? How did they meet? Did daddy love her? Peyton found as the months went by she was able to answer these questions without falling apart. She found it cathartic to talk about him and laugh with Sawyer about how great her father was.

Peyton knelt in front of Luke's grave, Sawyer sat cross-legged in her lap and they laid some flowers down. Sawyer reached into the pocket of her jacket and placed a picture she had drawn of their family. Sawyer was in the middle of her parents and they were each holding one of her hands, everyone had a smile-she had written at the bottom, 'I love you Daddy'. Peyton whispered a blessing and said,

'You would be so proud of her Luke; she's just like you, full of kindness and love. She loves to read and she even plays basketball. She loves music as well; she dances all the time and even comes to work with me. I'm sorry you don't get to see her grow up and share all these moments with her. I love you Luke and I miss you every day'.

She stood up and pressed a kiss to the top of the tombstone, Sawyer copied her mother and the two of them walked hand in hand away from his grave. Peyton's heart didn't ache so much and Sawyer was the reason for this, she had an everyday reminder of her love with Luke and that somehow made it all the more bearable.


End file.
